Signs a Dating Relationship is in Trouble

I am always concerned that we have problems keeping our heads straight about dating, marriage, and relationships so, hopefully we can consider the things this guys says and be a little more objective about our passion problems.  

If we want, and we often do, we can convince ourselves that just about any relationship is OK, but we need a little objectivity in this area.  Hopefully these next posts will help....

Six Signs The Dating Relationship Is In Trouble…

by perry

One of the things I love to teach on is the subject of relationships…and since we are in a series on parenting here at NewSpring, today I thought I would address the awesome single peeps in our church. In working with college students and singles for over a decade…here are six signs you can use to see whether or not your relationship may be in trouble.

#1 - You Are Not Spiritually Compatible.

I hear it all the time, "But Perry, I know he/she is not a Christian, but dating me will change that." Let me be very clear…God did call us to be missionaries, but not on the dating field. He is very clear in His Word that Christians and non-Christians should not date (II Corinthians 6:14-15). And trust me, this always leads to problems down the road–always!

AND…you are NOT the Holy Spirit–He changes people–and not through dating. "But Perry, I know this one couple and…" Yes, I know…you know a success story or two, trust me–I know MANY more stories that didn't turn out so good.

One more thing on this–even among Christians you need to decide if you are spiritually compatible if the relationship gets serious. This will require some serious conversations and a serious seeking of Scripture on a personal level to really own what you believe and why. (I Peter 3:15)

"Big Day" Report

Well, the "Big Day" has passed and it went very well. We played a
little game, learned about central Africa from everyone (thanks!) and
heard from Proverbs how to control our tongue. Then after a great
message in church we all went to the park and had a pretty nice
little cookout.

- we got kicked out of our pavilion, but stole a table when no one
was looking:)
- Rachel can throw the frisbee better than all the girls
- i learned how to throw a frisbee like 100 yards (i was pretty
impressed with myself)
- The ribs were awesome!

We were one measly person away from our goal, but I am not in the
least bit disappointed, to be honest. The way I got to see everyone
involved and working for this day and all the progress that we made
for the next days was worth the whole thing. Thanks for all the hard
work! I think we can praise the Lord for the day. He was good to us.

Lets do it again.

Motivation

You have got to read this article on motivation from Tony Howeth's Blog if you care anything about being motivated or a leader.  Dont know if you do, just thought it was good.

Burning for Marriage

Well, I have heard many quote this verse as the reason they are getting married, but I think John Piper does a good job here of explaining the balance of this verse.  You better use your head deciding on a mate!  A very small percentage of your 168 hours a week is going to be spent doing what everyone seems to be so focused on.  What do you think happens the rest of the time??  You have to live together and like each other, and talk!  One day your sexual desire will be satisfied....what then?  Better think about it before you marry for one reason.....

Here is what John says....

"    I should say just one brief word about that infamous sentence in 1 Corinthians 7:9: "If they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion." Remember, this is addressed explicitly to men and women (v. 8). And here is the one thing I want to say about it: When a person seeks to be married, knowing that as a single he or she would "burn with passion," it doesn't have to mean that marriage becomes a mere channel for the sex drive. Paul would never mean that in view of Ephesians 5.

    Instead when a person marries—let me simply use the man as an example—he takes his sexual desire, and he does the same thing with it that we must all do with all our physical desires if we would make them means of worship—1) he brings it into conformity to God's word; 2) he subordinates it to a higher pattern of love and care; 3) he transposes the music of physical pleasure into the music of spiritual worship, 4) he listens for the echoes of God's goodness in every nerve; 5) he seeks to double his pleasure by making her joy his joy; and 6) he gives thanks to God from the bottom of his heart because he knows and he feels that he never deserved one minute of this pleasure."

Big day Sunday

Well, havent written too much on here, but we sure have been busy.

Dont know the last thing i skipped, but since Matthew's Banquet we
singles have been to a Falcons game, whitewater rafting on the Ocoee
and had so many on Sunday that we were bringing in chairs from other
rooms.

So, if you have been away, its time to come back! We're going up!

Matthew's Banquet

This Sunday is probably going to be the most exciting day of the year!  Its Matthews Banquet and people have been inviting for weeks and even months for this one day.  We have some special things up our sleeve, including some chicken and other free food, and I want to challenge you to do all you can to invite everyone you can.

The whole point of the banquet is to give us an excuse to invite our friends....I mean, how offensive could it be to invite people to have a free meal with you at your church?  Not very.  So, I hope you will be here and be ready to see what God will do.  Our goal is 200 and we expect to have at least that.  So, it should be fun.

If you want to help there will be lots of work going on Saturday morning....inviting, calling, visiting, planning, decorating, setting up...etc.  So, if you were available, you could come at 10 and get your hands dirty.

Lion chasers manifesto

Well, I actually dont know the context of this "lion chasing" that I found, but I would assume it may be about david killing the lion or something.  But you know, you can never tell stories, or know what it is like to kill a "lion" if you never chase it....

Lion Chasers Manifesto

Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. 

Set God-sized goals. 

Pursue God-ordained passions. 

Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. 

Keep asking questions. 

Keep making mistakes. 

Keep seeking God. 

Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. 

Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. 

Stop playing it safe and start taking risks. 

Expand your horizons. 

Accumulate experiences. 

Consider the lilies. 

Enjoy the journey. 

Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. 

Live like today is the first day and last day of your life. 

Don't let what's wrong with you keep you from worshipping what's right with God. 

Burn sinful bridges. 

Blaze a new trail. 

Criticize by creating. 

Worry less about what people think and more about what God thinks. 

Don't try to be who you're not. 

Be yourself. 

Laugh at yourself. 

Quit holding out. 

Quit holding back. 

Quit running away. 

Chase the lion!